90% is still an A, amiright?!

Gah! I have failed you all again 😦

But also again, it was for wonderful reasons.. I spent time with some of my favorite people, celebrated a birthday (and you know how much I love Birthdays!), and saw Beauty and The Beast with my most favorite people in the whole world. Well, maybe I bribed him, lol – because I paid, knowing I would love the movie more than him. But c’mon, I also chose Batman Lego Movie, and that movie was bomb!

Anyway, I don’t have much insight or news, rather, just sharing that it was definitely a weekend of getting my life back together. I cleaned, did laundry (with still two more loads to go! 😦 ) went grocery shopping, ran some errands.. You know, all the simple things that trick your brain into thinking you have your life in order..! Lol

Stress is still keeping off the track with my heart-break-dancing, but I do have an appointment in a week to get that baby checked. All the small, wonderful moments of the weekend helped ease some thumping though 🙂 I haven’t been this happily tired in a long time 🙂

I hope everyone out there had at least a good moment this weekend, and more so, I hope Monday didn’t take away the goodness ❤

 

🙂

 

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The first..

..day.

Here I am, as promised – I can do this! And don’t worry, I won’t name every post in conjunction with the days of the month. Today really feels like the first of something though. I do often feel this way this time of year because my Birthday month is officially over, and I view this time as my New Year.

But today was a little different. It began as most days do, get up, get ready, go to work.. I was feeling good, only working a 1/2 day motivated me into being productive. I got a lot done, then headed out into the most gorgeous weather.. so unexpected! It was absolutely beautiful out. I went to get lunch..

I had a paleo smoothie and a steak bowl with rice and veggies from, where else! Whole Foods 🙂 Sounds pretty decent, right? But that’s where everything changed. I don’t know if it was what I ate, or maybe the sun was confusing my senses.. But all of a sudden, I just wanted to go home. I looked at myself, having to unbutton the top button of my pants thinking.. has it really gotten to this!? I was uncomfortable.

Mind you, I’m a small person by nature anyway, but there is one time in my life where I sort of “let go” of myself so bad that I was uncomfortable. Well now, let’s make that two. The last time this happened, was about 6 years ago. A year after that, I made a huge life change.

This time around, I will admit, after the wedding I was in back in November, I pulled like a wild I’M DONE moment and wanted to eat a cookie, or 25. Stress from work did not help the situation, and I am a terrible stress-eater. I stopped going to the gym, yoga, my trainer, running. And now here I am.. almost 4 months later with my “fat” pants that now also no longer fit. I actually pulled these pants out of my year-old Salvation Army pile.. yes, that bad.. They no longer fit me. Well now, they no longer fit in a whole new way 😦

I’m sure this  happens to the best of us, where “life just keeps happening” and we “lose track of time”, and ourselves. Until that one day.. today apparently for me.. you look at yourself, and don’t even know what you’re looking at anymore.

It’s funny because this feeling has many facets.. I also felt this way right after my divorce, not in this sense of pant size necessarily, but emotionally. Then again, I also wasn’t eating at the time, so my pant size probably did make me sad at the time also. Anyway, I didn’t let myself go per say, but I lost who I was and didn’t know who was staring me in the face anymore. Point is, my health journey encompasses so many aspects of other life journeys that in a time like today, it’s sort of humbling to stare at myself and question what is actually happening to have put me in this situation.

Interestingly enough, it’s also day 1 of my personal Blog Challenge.. I almost didn’t even open up my computer. I made myself feel better by shopping online – got new “larger” pants for work, and other items sort of as punishment, because if I don’t get my act together, those items won’t fit. I can’t believe I even admitted that.

Anyway, I “forced” myself to blog today – I made myself a promise, and if there is one person I always challenge and work to make proud, it’s myself. So the plan is to use that same motivation on myself directly. Physically, mentally, emotionally. I can do this.

And to be clear, this has nothing to do with pant-size directly, but my comfort. More so, how I view myself. I don’t think anyone out there ever wants to look in a mirror and be disappointed. I didn’t want to disappoint myself by not typing at least 5 words today.. I can use that same motivation with myself.

Let’s see what other first days come out of this.

21 days to form a habit

I know, I know, there are balls that keep dropping!

Well, for a quick update, Birthday Month has been in full effect and finishes in 7 days! 😦

I hope with this new year and new beginning, you all can feel my positive energy seeping through whatever screen you are using to read this!

Speaking of New Beginnings! I have a plan – I like giving myself mini-challenges, like when I signed up for a 30-day Bikram Yoga Challenge two years ago.. that was the best shape I’ve been in, and the best feeling os self I’ve had in a long time.. so why did I stop!? Well, I know myself enough to know I need challenges. Call it boredom or loving new things, but I definitely start feeling stagnant when I start feeling comfortable or feel like I’ve reached some sort of personal goal. I need, and I’m sure many do, another push, something either a little bit harder, or something new that uses new muscles – mentally and physically.

And thus, my challenge was born.. So, for those who don’t follow me on social media, every year on my Birthday Month, I bombard Facebook with #quotesfordays. It’s really the only time of year I’m actually “social” lol. I share a quote, or three, daily to spread happiness, inspiration, ideas, and everyday thoughts I find interesting or insightful. Over the long weekend I thought about this and wondered.. if I can take 5min sometimes 10min of my day to post a random quote, then why havent I been able to do that with my blog? There are plenty of short blogs, strange blogs, blogs filled with nonsense.. All of which don’t need hours at a computer to express a thought. And if I have been struggling the past year to even post one thing, then why have I not used this idea or strategy to sort of “force” myself to tap my little fingers and create some words?

So once February ends.. my challenge is for the month of March, I will post something, whether it be 5 words or 500, just any blog post to fill your little feeds with my crazy brain.

The way I see it, after 31 days of tip-tapping I should have formed some sort of habit right? Just as my title reads – sadly however, if that didn’t work with yoga, I am still questioning the outcome of what’s to come when April hits. As James Clear recently taught me while researching this 21 day theory:

On average, it takes more than 2 months before a new behavior becomes automatic — 66 days to be exact. And how long it takes a new habit to form can vary widely depending on the behavior, the person, and the circumstances. In Lally’s study, it took anywhere from 18 days to 254 days for people to form a new habit. http://jamesclear.com/new-habit

So ok, that’s a little sad that I may not form a habit.. but it definitely kick-starts something. Because I still do yoga.. I’m just not as consistent.. mainly because I also enjoy running, and weight-lifting, and playing volleyball. I told you, I get bored. And I do still write in a journal also, so I’ve got to find balance.

Honestly, my goal is to get to a point where I can post something at least once a month, until I become a famous blogger, of course. 😉 And if this personal challenge can dust off my brain and remind me why I loved writing/blogging in the first place, then I will celebrate success.

I hope you are all as excited as I am! Here’s to Birthday Month and New Beginnings! And of course, thank you all for continuing to read, even one view means a whole lot ❤

I’ll see you all again in about 7 days! 🙂

Cheers!

 

deja vu.. like 100 times

Well hello there!

Here we are again.. yup, you guessed it! Birthday MONTH! 🙂

I always seem to resurface this time of year.. if not now, usually around the New Year.. then make my way back right around February.. aka – Birthday time. I know its a little repetitive, and probably somewhat annoying, but no matter how often I blog about life, Birthdays (yup the word should always be capitalized), and being grateful for both, I’m constantly finding myself having this conversation with people who have already heard it and have, say, “forgotten”.

Biggest pet-peeve (after liars): People who say they “hate” their Birthdays or “don’t like them”.

Ok fine. And not to sound harsh here, but hey, there’s always the alternative (cliche much?). But seriously, if that’s what you would have preferred the past year, or years even, is to die vs being graced with another year of wisdom, age, and knowledge – then well then I’m just a jerk for making you see any gratitude in having a day of birth at all.

And what I seem to find is, most people who “don’t like” their Birthdays, are normally the ones who aren’t living their lives to their potential, or expectation – and see growing “older” as just another day closer to having aching bones and wheelchairs.

You see this is where I want to slap all of these people.. with words of course. Hehe.

Because age means nothing.. that number you are so focused on? It just describes how long you have been blessed on this planet. It does not define who you are, and what you can or cannot do. It does not define your dreams and aspirations. There are 80yr olds running marathons.. and 21yr olds killing themselves on prescription drugs. I know those are extremes.. but really where would you prefer to land? Somewhere in the middle I’m sure.. but I’ll tell you what.. I’d love to be that 80yr running just a 5K! My point is, aside from major issues that physically and mentally deprive a person, i.e. dementia, certain stages of cancer, losing a limb (which even still doesn’t hold some people back!) the only thing that creates an “old age” mentality is yourself. You choose whether or not you want to join a book club, focus on your career goals, life goals, join a running club, yoga class, jump out of airplanes.. whatever. YOU make YOURSELF OLD, not the number of years you’ve been alive.

Seriously.

And to be clear, I’m not making anyone enjoy or celebrate their Birthday as much as I do. I’m just trying to explain that by saying you don’t “like” the day you were born – shows not only a choice of non-motivation to age gracefully, but also a level of ungratefulness. And some of you out there may be saying.. “Now hooold on a minute.. I didn’t SAY I was ungrateful!” Oh you didn’t? Well let’s just look at this logically here.. I can understand how we can sometimes be grateful for things we “don’t like” like say – coffee, or my bed, or friends, and being alive. Oh wait I LIKE ALL THOSE THINGS.

Ok so then.. I’m not grateful for liars, or traffic, or death. Oh wait.. I DON’T like all those things! Point is, it’s difficult to be grateful and not like something that you’re grateful for. Ok, so maybe sometimes I’m grateful for traffic because I was able to finish a really good song on the radio, or it kept me from a car accident.. I don’t really “like” the traffic per say, but I like what it has given me and am grateful for the song, or the non-accident.

So looking at this in a broader, still logical sense – to be grateful for life doesn’t mean you have to “like” Birthday’s – but yet the whole purpose of the Birthday was to GIVE you life. Just like the whole “purpose” of that traffic (if you believe in the Universe or God) was to keep you safe from an accident and let you listen to something that makes you happy. So in essence you sort of “didn’t mind” that traffic because, in this simple instance,  your song was playing.

That’s where we need to be people – have a sense of “I don’t mind my Birthday, because I am grateful to have made it another year” vs “I hate” or ” I don’t like”. Because if you value Life at all – it only makes sense to value how you got here in the first place.

Another pet-peeve: When people use death as a “reminder” to be grateful for life.

I know this sounds a little harsh again, but shouldn’t LIFE be your reminder every day that you are alive?! Why must we wait until we lose something to be grateful? Why are so many of us incapable to find magic, and value, and gratefulness in our everyday lives? How about changing that perspective, especially on a bad day, to “Today royally sucked, but I am grateful I at least woke up this morning, and was able to tell ____ I love them. Or even “Ugh I’m sick today, but I’m grateful for sick-days because at least I don’t have to work today and can catch up on my Netflix shows”. Or more so, I’ve been having health issues but I am grateful I have a great Dr. and a great support system (friends/family) to help me in recovery or to battle this”. See what I did there?! Turned obvious life issues into something we can be grateful for.

And I understand tragedy exists and evil. I am a realist – an optimistic realist to be exact. I know and understand, and even sometimes expect bad or the negative side of things to happen. However, I keep faith and hope that the “good” side prevails. Does that always happen? Of course not – but it definitely provides a more positive way to look at any situation.

Find reminders everyday to be grateful for LIFE. Then hopefully, If/when a bad thing happens, or you experience loss, it’s not that you didn’t know it was coming.. but you have learned to grieve and move on – in essence, understanding the loss and being sad (because we are still human), but being grateful that you were able to enjoy the time you had vs feeling like every good moment has been taken away. Because you can’t “take away” moments, you know, they are always with you <3.

 

So here’s to another amazing Birthday Season where I look back, pause, and then look  forward. To see where I have been, where I am, and where I aspire to go. Never to hang out too long in any of those ideas though, because as we know, time is of the essence and we never know when tomorrow is our last tomorrow. Celebrate what’s in front of you, and celebrate LIFE.

 

Cheers!

 

 

the bestest celebration is.. Life.

(This has been sitting in my Drafts for SEVEN MONTHS – sorry! Finally posted! Thank goodness my ideas aren’t time-specific lol)

Birthday, Birthday, BIRTHDAYYY! 🙂

So for me, and a few of my friends, its Birthday Season – there are a handful of Birthdays from the end of January until about the second week in March.. then they sort of spread out from there.. either way, if you know anything about me, you’ll know that Birthday’s are my favorite days.

And I know why so many people don’t like them, I get it – another year older, another day closer to death.. blah, blah, blah.

I mean, why put a negative connotation on it? Because really, do you even understand what a Birthday is?! The day you were born. The end. Or if you wanna get technical:

birth . day /’berTH,dā/ noun – the day when someone was born or the anniversary of that day. The day when something began. (source – Merriam-Webster Dictionary, online)

See?! It’s just celebrating the day you were born! Or when you began! Not your age, or how many years it has been SINCE you were born.. Just a celebration of the day you were born. Or even, lets focus on the second part there: The day when something began.

Every year we celebrate a new beginning; A new day, a new year, new goals, new obstacles.. etc.

My best friend and I started a toast almost 3 years ago now.. It was during a transition period for both of us, coincidentally. (or was it?! #everythinghappensforareason 🙂 ) We went out for drinks and we always toast before the first sip. This one in particular we were digging in our brains to find things to toast to and not much was hitting home until one of said “To New Beginnings” That was it.

From that point on, we almost always toast to New Beginnings – why? well, because thats life. Every day is a New Beginning. A new start; A new job, a new car, a new workout, a new nail polish color.. whatever – it’s new! Something fresh. Just like Birthdays.

With all the tragedies in life, we need more celebrations. More New Beginnings. What’s that saying? “The secret to a rich life is to have more Beginnings than Endings.” -Dave Weinbaum

We all know life is short, and we can talk about that till we turn blue. The point is, every time a Birthday comes around, whether it’s me, you, or someone else, it is a Celebration of Life. It’s a New Beginning. So heres to making more of those count so we can really only have just one “ending”.

Cheers! To New Beginnings 🙂